It all sounded like a good idea…..Cyril Ramaphosa himself had recorded a video welcoming the BRICS delegates “home”.   The BRICS leaders were to be taken to the Cradle of Humankind, South Africa’s most impressive graveyard, to look at skulls, bones - and to learn that they were all descended from Africans.  So there!

But in a Summit where BRICS more accurately stands for Bungles Regrets Incompetence Clowns and Shambles – even this cradle and grave visit was doomed to failure.

Instead….   Er…

The leaders remained in Sandton, a Comrades Marathon or so away from the Cradle, and were able to watch a live link to the place of death.  At this late stage, they couldn’t even jet in David Attenborough to do the commentary.  

Although maybe at his age he might feel a bit uncomfortable surrounded by all those (not-yet) human bones.  

This was a change to the schedule, so your guess is as good as mine on which BRICS leader had thrown his toys out of the cot/cradle. 

Had you been caught short and had to rush off the the loo, you might have missed the rather short public summit session, in which the five leaders rattled off a few remarks each on the 4th Industrial Revolution, how horrid Donald Trump is (though not often by name) and how the planet faces the same sort of self-destruction…as the Summit itself.

Of course, there were useful business discussions, and the world may never know about the really important stuff, as it was discussed behind closed doors, with no video link.    No watered-down, lengthy statements.

There was a Johannesburg Declaration by the BRIC summiteers.   It’s long.   Very long.  Full of worthiness, trumped by dullness.  Google it next time you are having trouble getting to sleep.

There was an effort to immortalise this Summit, so that one day in a million years or so a far-more-evolved descendent of ours could return to a nuclear-wrecked planet and stumble upon a memorial at the Cradle of Humankind. 

The BRICS leaders made imprints of their hands in clay in Sandton, which could then be sent to the Cradle (hopefully not with the SA Post Office) and then be put on display.

Suggested slogan for the display?    

“One day the leaders of BRICS used their playtime putty to cast impressions of their hands.   Let’s hope they checked afterwards to make sure their watches were still on their wrists.  Ashes to Ashes.  BRICS to clay.”

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Peter Joffe 7/27/2018 12:33:39 PM
This is very funny and a joy to read. Brics could be the start of a new Marvel set of comics. What South Africa us doing among the real nations of the world is a riddle for us. If Jacob Zuma has anything to do with Brics you can expect them to go into receivership soon.
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